I’m not for you to play

Scared and scarred

I decide to not step out

I decide to stay home

But am dragged

Dragged by my friends

Male friends, to be precise

I’m in a white kurta

Stupid me

The colour on my forehead

The water down my body

The intoxication inside of me

No

No

Don’t touch me

I’m not for you to play

No

Move away

I’m not for you to play

I struggle

A lot

I’m not for you to play

His hands stroke my cheeks

His hands play with my waist

His eyes set on my wet bosom

I’m not for you to play

I look around for help

But who’s even here?

They’re all here

All victims

Like me

No

No

We’re not for you to play

Splash

And I’m thrown into a pool of water

Splash

He jumps into the water

Splash

He holds my back

Splash

He doesn’t look into my eyes

I push him

I try hard to

But nothing

No

No

I’m not for you to play

Stay away

But no

It doesn’t work

It doesn’t help

He comes closer

I go closer

The intoxicated he

The intoxicated me

 

Now change your voice

 

She comes closer

Much closer

No

I’m not for you to play

She knows I’m scared of water

So I don’t try to escape

Splash

More people jump in

Splash

More women around me

No

No

I’m not for you to play

Their hands around my waist

Their hands on my chest

Their hands around my crotch

No

Stop

I’m not for you to play

They rip my kurta

I stand there

Topless

Ashamed

But of what?

Of patriarchy

Of misogyny

Of the wrong men have done

Over all these years

Of the wrong done to women

Over all these years

They leave me alone

They go away

She goes away

No

No

I’m not for you to play

You’re not for me to play.

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